1. RESPECT THE ROAD
The road is not a game. The road was there before you and it will be there after you, it’s the magic to move swiftly over the earth. Honor this
2. PACK LIGHT
This goes for backpacks and volvos, camping and the burn. Make ninja use of your space. Be humble in your possessions. Pack what you need, and then burn half that crap. The road is for nimble warriors. You will not regret this. You will have room for all the treasures. Then give those away. Make room for your new friends.
3. USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM
Speaking of your new friends, keep a homie witchu, it’s literally never a bad idea. Everything is more fun. Someone will be able to help you remember the story. You are a team. Be prepared and be honest.
4. YOU HAVE TO LEAVE TO RETURN
Let that settle a touch. You physically have to leave, to metaphysically return. Learn to MOVE ON, Skip Town, Kick Rocks, flow out, roll, jump, mosey. All of it. You need the space. They need the space. If you want to be a boss gypsy you have to know when to pack up the circus. Don’t be sad, you will come dazzle them again next year. They will truly love you, because now, they get to miss you.
5. LET THE MUSIC STEER
Think about it, the music is everything, it’s why the road matters. There is just absolutely nothing like watching the world melt past you with your favorite song blasting. From Graceland to 36 Chambers, Garden Grove to Georgia. We’ve put miles on the odometer with miles on the radio. THE DJ Rides shotgun but the pilot calls the shots. All ways.
6. LISTEN TO SPIRIT
If You think this is hippy bullshit. Or too new agey, you can skip ahead, you will never understand the road anyway. Getting on the road, ESPECIALLY when you don’t care where you’re going. Is a sacred pilgrimage, dancing with great mystery for real. Who will you meet? Where will you go? Is this fate? Important questions to ignore. Trust the directions. Trust spirit. The road is fucking magic. Get your pumpkin to the ball.
7. DRIVE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IS AN IDIOT
They probably are. Some times, you are. I definitely am. Don’t text, don’t spill your coffee. Don’t forget to take your uppers, sleeping is highly discouraged while doing 80. Stay sharp or get to a parking lot or motel. Wear your bloody seat belt. It might kill you. But it will probably save you. At the very least it will help prevent you from killing the other people in the car.
8. THE ROAD IS THE DESTINATION
This is crucial, the “Are we there yet” mentality is sacrilege. Micro universe with horses under hoods. If you are on the road, yes, you are there, move. See it all. There is something weird happening somewhere. This is the anti-fomo. You are winning races with the wind.
9. SAVE THAT MONEY
You want to have some for emergencies, the best way to have some money, is to save what little you got for the thrift shop, new tires, sushi, ayahuasca. Be frugal and then when the stars align, Bet the fucking house.
10. Go Alone
Yes this is the opposite of Number 3. Number 3 is important for the kind of people who don’t finish an article they start reading. Go. All. One. Not every time. No way. But sometimes. The road is a teacher, and she can be a hard, violent teacher, this has been true since the very first roads, just when you think you have her figured out, she ditches you. But if she likes you, she lets you make the rules.